Wow it’s been a minute. Which is also the name of a Podcast I listen to with Sam Sanders (or something like that) Look there’s a lot of Podcast in 2021. It’s like 30% of what we do. Ok today is Thanksgiving and your mom tricked me in to making her General Tsao’s chicken instead of having an actual Thanksgiving. FYI for future reference you’re mom hates Thanksgiving food. We did see Ghostbusters Afterlife in theaters which is an amazing thing to do in 2021. Less so in 2019, but seriously a big deal in COVID times. Ok last time we checked we established you were a boy and free of known genetic things. What’s going on with you… well a couple weeks ago we found out you had a heartbeat of 154 annddd a couple of nights ago your mom had buffalo wings and you kicked! Like hard enough to be felt on her belly. So good job! Next week we have your anatomy scan so we’re going to measure all your bits and bobs. So, I guess this is the first time I’ll see you properly I want to apologize now but we’re probably going to spend a non-zero amount of time looking at your penis. Trust me it’s going to be weird for me for most of your childhood. I want you to know my greatest (likely to happen fear) of your early years is that terrible time I need to use the restroom and you have to come with me. Like seriously I feel like we’ll both be traumatized if you have to see me poop.
Other than that, everything is thankfully chill on our end. You have stopped making your mom throw up every day, more like every couple of days. Tomorrow we babysit Leanne’s baby Ren. Hopefully you guys will be friends! Your mom and I are arguing a lot who should be your god parents. This is a surprisingly tough decision. We need to find someone who we trust with you and managing and the estate that comes with you. Like seriously these are the things no one ever prepared me about being a dad. Also, I told my dad about you for the third time. He has dementia, which is so sad, but every time I tell him he’s so frikkin excited. So just know your grandpa was stoked about your existence even though you will sadly probably never get to meet him ☹ On the plus side you’ll know your grandparents on your mom’s side and your grandpa there is very kind. Super hippy but a really nice guy.